情為何物 | 尊重是最深的溫柔
人氣: 32245
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當我們開始喜歡上一個人,我們首先需要學會的是尊重。我們需要尊重彼此的不同,不同的性格,不同的喜好,不同的背景......我們不能強迫對方跟自己一樣,這是霸道而沒有禮貌的。
但當你開始愈來愈喜歡他,你不發覺,有時你會不經意地強迫他跟你一樣。

你喜歡吃日本菜,他喜歡西餐;你喜歡打籃球,他喜歡看書。這些是喜好上的不同,不太難遷就。有時你陪他,有時他陪你不就可以了?你喜歡熱鬧,他喜歡安靜;你喜歡結識新朋友,他喜歡獨處。這是性格上的不同,有點難。他不可以阻止你認識新朋友,只因為他不喜歡這樣做,我們需要尊重。

你認為這件事最佳的處理手法應該是這樣,他不認同。你認為這個決定是最好了,他不認同。這是看法上的不同,更難了。我們可以給對方寶貴的意見並衷心希望他好,但我們不能左右他的決定,因為這是他的決定而不是你的。我們要尊重對方不接納自己的意見,尊重對方的決定。

你認為這件事沒有不對,但他認為這是錯的。你絕不能接受這種事發生,但他偏偏要這樣做。這是價值觀的不同,更更難了。你會失望,沮喪,傾盡所能去說服對方,但請你不要這樣做。
我們更需要的是尊重,尊重我們的不同,接受自己,接受他,接受我們是不同的。


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